Last week, Fool’s March Chancellor Sabre Thornton abruptly disappeared during a charity gala hosted at Triumph House in City Center. While members of the Cassius Cleaners were initially chief suspects, the return of the Chancellor led to their exoneration by the city guard. Additional inquiries into the event are being led by the Central Authority Chief Inspector (CACI) Bert Macklin. While he’s a busy, brusque fellow, he graciously agreed to a quick interview to discuss the details of the Chancellor’s reappearance and the ongoing CACI investigation.
Macklin casts an imposing figure for his height. With slick backed hair, dark sunglasses (even indoors), and the ever-present toothpick that protrudes from between his lips, it’s hard to guess at what this special unit detective might be thinking. His badge is slung around his neck and is partially visible under a heavy trench coat, spotted with stains- some mud, some likely of questionable substance, given the investigations this hardened lawman finds himself on. He stares me down as I sputter out a greeting and emphasize my appreciation of his time:
Clearcrest Chronicle: “Mr. Macklin, thank you very much for your time- I know you’re a busy man.” The man simply grunts in acknowledgement in a gruff voice while gnawing the end of his toothpick.
CC: “Right. I see you’re a man who likes to get straight down to business. Would you be able to share any details on where chancellor Sabre Thornton disappeared to while hosting a charity gala last week?
Bert Macklin: “I got the opportunity to personally interrogate the Chancellor. After ranking the members of the Cassius Cleaners in order of how useful they are and then by sexiness, I was finally able to crack him and get some answers.” At this, he pauses to replace his toothpick with another- the old one snapped and soggy from constant saturation. “As this is an ongoing investigation, all I can reveal on the matter at this time is that the Chancellor was involved in a secret sting operation. One that required quick egress from the premises of Triumph House the night of the gala. Once the operation was complete, the Chancellor was able to safely return home.”
CC: “A…sting operation? That seems slightly suspicious given that he’s a man of such high profile, does it not?”
BM: “Those are my CACI thoughts exactly, Ms. Waithwraite. Keen observation. Hence my ongoing investigation.”
CC: “Would you be willing or able to share any further details on where your investigations have lead you?” Mr. Macklin pauses for a moment and it’s hard to get a read on him from behind his glasses. He finally looks up, scratching the stubble on his chin and takes a deep breath.
BM: “Well, Ms. Waithwraite, I’m usually not a big fan of the press, but I like you. You’ve got gumption.” After another pause where he appears to be considering some things, he continues, “Here’s what else I can share with you- as part of the investigations, I recruited the help of The Bright Edge Brigade. With Fool’s March having no official City Guard presence, it’s the closest I could get to a law enforcement presence from the Chancellor’s own district. Big, quiet fella. Goes by the name Drerlemzok Truvzomzomo. But don’t hurt yourself pronouncing his name. Can’t even promise I just got it right,” he stops and chuckles briefly at this. “I just call him Drew.”
CC: “So, where have your investigations taken you and…Drew?”
BM: “We’ve actually been following leads all around the city. One such lead actually took us not to far from Triumph House- we received a tip from an anonymous message suggesting that some evidence was left outside of Ferroholm. After searching the property, we believe to have found the evidence in question with some help from a catfolk and a Drow man named Jasper Thelspar.”
CC: “Ferroholm? As in, the home to the Tinker Town Chancellor?”
BM: “The very one, ma’am. As part of our investigations, we also found that, after having a sheep left in his custody, Cadmun Copperfist decided to open a sheep farm. A gnome woman named Mandy Monhollith manages this farm for him. There’s a regular tourist trade happening there now. They sell a number of wool garments- great for the coming cold months; beanies stating ‘Tinker Town Rocks’ and sweaters with silly sayings on them like, ‘I Smelt For You’.”
CC: “Well that’s…very interesting? Do you believe this sheep farm has something to do with Sabre Thornton’s sting operation?”
BM: “Oh, not at all. Glenjerman…Glen? Jerry? Manny? Gah, the dwarf selling the woolen gear. Fellow couldn’t assist with a sting operation if he fell over it. But the clothes certainly keep you warm and are very stylish. I mean, check this out!” At this, the serious detective seems suddenly childlike as he throws open his trench coat, revealing a green sweater with gold accents underneath. The phrase, ‘Hard as a Diamond’ is sewn across the chest. He looks down at it and chuckles to himself.
CC: “With all due respect sir, what does this have to do with the ongoing investigations for the chancellor?” The detective’s demeanor changes instantly and he’s the stoic, hard-edged lawman once more.
BM: “Do you think I take this lightly, Ms. Waithwraite? Do you think I’m just walking around shopping like some tourist?? Of course not! I was making connections and finding information. You see, at that very stall I got to talking to the aforementioned Drow- Jasper. As it turns out, the man has a set of…special arcane abilities. It was with these abilities that we were able to gather more information about the Chancellor’s sting operation!”
CC: “Mr. Macklin, I meant no offense! Would you be able to share what you learned using this Drow’s arcane abilities?” After a moment of careful consideration, the detective continues.
BM: “Alright, I will. What we were able to learn about the sting operation was that the Chancellor made an attempt to communicate that he was in some level of danger from a man known simply as ‘X’ the night of the charity gala. We don’t know who this X works for, but the Chancellor was under the assumption that he was working in cooperation with the Chancellor. While we’re still not sure what this means, we also learned that there’s a ‘key’ hidden in ‘the Xaegrim Empire’. As part of this information gathering we also learned that the Chancellor keeps a file on this X character in his office. Finally, we know that the Chancellor was cursed prior to this sting operation- he was apparently working with this X fellow to find a cure for it.
He pauses briefly, taking a deep breath before continuing, “Those are the five pieces of information we were able to get out of him- it was like talking to a dead guy, if you know what I mean.” At this, he moves the toothpick to the side of his mouth with a quick flick of the tongue and gives me a strange, knowing smile.
CC: “Are you making…an undead joke?” The serious detective breaks character briefly and lets out a guffaw.
BM: “Now Ms. Waithwraite, don’t be ridiculous. Definitely dead, but not undead. That would just be insensitive given your…state of being.”
CC: “Right. Well, all of this sounds quite…perplexing, honestly. Do you have any other interesting leads that you’re following at present?” The detective once more pulls a new toothpick from somewhere within his trench coat to replace the now heavily-saturated and chewed one before answering.
BM: “Things have begun to quiet significantly in the city since then. Drew and I were even sent on a rookie errand to go retrieve the effects of the previously imprisoned Cassius Cleaners. Made a good bet on the Knicks that I’m hoping pans out though.” He pauses momentarily, scratches the back of his head, thinking deeply before continuing. “As of now, the only rumblings I’ve heard worth investigating are some reports of some undead imposters pretending to be city guardsmen out in Philomath. Might poke around and see if I can get some information on what all that’s about…”
CC: “Wait, what was that? Undead guardsmen in Philomath…?”
BM: “Wait- that last part was off the record. Uh, yeah. Gee, look at the time. There are criminals to catch!” The brusque detective suddenly stands up and, with a sweep of his trench coat, is out the door.
Secret sting operations, mysterious men with single letter names, and a new wool sweater stall just outside of a Chancellor’s home. These are but a few of the secrets that one of this city’s greatest detectives was able to share with us. Remember to stay tuned for ongoing updates regarding this investigation!
The Clearcrest Chronicle 